#NaBloMoPo in 6 Words

I Hate Endings, Maybe

Today’s prompt for NaBloPoMo is how you feel about endings. I hate endings. But, I love new beginnings. I suppose you can’t have one without the other but one does not necessarily mean a bad thing anymore than the other. As much as I hate endings you can’t have a new start without something ending.

The end of NaBloPoMo is tomorrow and I have successfully written a blog post a day for November. This is the first time in three years that I have been able to accomplish a blog post a day, on purpose. Some posts were okay and others were better. One post was featured on BlogHer and some posts just went unnoticed. I had a typo in the title of one post and I thought for sure I would just die of embarrassment. (I didn’t). And, one post hit over a thousand views (I may have had a small stroke) which is a lot for me to get in one week (and it wasn't the one on BlogHer). I even wrote a post checking something off my list.

Endings can be beautiful and sweet. They can be heart wrenchingly sad but also uplifting and joyous. Endings can bring closure and acceptance as well as provide perspective. Maybe I don’t hate endings as much as I thought I did. Maybe I only dislike endings. Maybe I should stop looking at things as ending but as a beginning. Would that be denial?

Change can be wonderful and scary. Change is just another ending disguised as a positive. My experience this month has changed me. It has invigorated my writing and even lead to a couple of new opportunities. I am learning from my mistakes, still, and slowly growing as a writer. Writing is not my first love but I am learning to love it as a creative outlet in a way that I never imagined. I am so very grateful that anyone would read what I write and thankful that someone does.

Thank you.

December in Northeast Ohio is OH so much fun and #HappyinCLE!

December in Northeast Ohio is OH so much fun!

You can't say there isn't holiday spirit in Northeast Ohio! Here is our list to bring all the things that the kids and I would do if we had unlimited time and money.  Some are free, most are not, but all are guaranteed* to be good fun. Don't forget to check out the calendar at the bottom!

* I do not really guarantee anything and do call before going

Our Top Picks for December!

Glow at the Cleveland Botanical Garden

By far one of my favorites.  Last year I was given the honor to judge the gingerbread house competition and they are amazing.  We can't wait to go this year!  Besides and incredible gingerbread house display and Christmas trees from local garden clubs but they have evening hours to see the amazing lights and breakfast with Santa on Decemeber 7 and 8. 

Holiday Lantern Tours at Hale Farm & Village (@WRHS ) 

Transport guests to the Christmas season during the year 1863. This holiday favorite is a 90-minute lantern-lit evening tour held December 7, 13-15 and 18-23.

Law and Order: Fairy Tale Unit

There are so many brilliant plays with Christmas themes but I really want to see Law & Order: Fairy Tale Unit at the Beck Center in Lakewood.  Yes, there is the Christmas Story at the Allen Theater but come on... what a title!

THE NUTCRACKER 

Cedar Lee Theater Sunday, December 15th at 11 AM (showing in 2D) Wednesday, December 18th at 7 PM (showing in 3D)



Or see it live

Moscow Ballet’s celebrated Great Russian Nutcracker 

Cleveland's Music Hall on Saturday, December 7th, at 3:00 PM.

Looking for outdoor fun? The Ice Rink at Wade Oval is open till March.

Light Up Lakewood on December 7 and Holiday CircleFest at Wade Oval on December 8 are my two favorite Christmas festivals.

Ice Age 2013 - December 1st - January 5th, 2014

Tired of the Christmas and Holiday stuff?  Looking for something else to do during the holiday break then this is for you and while in the area check out the The Crawford Auto Aviation Collection exhibit Setting the World in Motion

There is so much more!  Check out my pinterest and calendar below

Calendar

What's on your list?

Follow MryJhnsn iNeed a Playdate Northeast Ohio Bucket List on Pinterest


**Fine Print: All events are add at my own discretion but Western Reserve Historical Society has given me a family membership to facilitate reviews. Opinions are 100% my own. If you would like to be added to this list or to become a sponsor feel free to contact me.

9 Hidden (But True) Things About About Me

1. I am participating in NaBloMoPo and can't think of a thing to write but I am basing this list very loosely on the prompt for today.  I also misspelled the original title of this post and did not realize until it was everywhere.

2.  I may be the last of my friends to watch Downtown Abby.

3.  I have panic attacks but a side from one time a few months ago, they are under control.

4.  I won outstanding colleague in the second quarter this year at my job.

5. I still wear socks with my birkenstocks.

6. I admit to my Husband when I have crushes.

7. My Husband is a better cook.

8. This is my favorite instagram picture of all time:
9.  I will be featured on BlogHerFamily tomorrow for this post.  The original post is here.

#GoFundMe, Helping Bring Christmas to One Family

Where do you turn to when you need a little help at Christmas time? Family, parents, church?  What if those aren't options?

Recently I found out that our close friends are struggling.  They had adopted their grandchildren years ago because their parents were unfit and gave these kids they love they needed.  Due to illness, surgery and medical bills that they had not anticipated this family may not be able to give these kids much this Christmas.

They aren't asking for much either but I went in search of an organization to help however the deadlines to join have passed.  Funny thing is, they are helping to organize a Toys for Tots event this December but they are to late to add their kids to the list.

I have only known them a few years but they are truly the most generous people I know.  They open their doors to anyone in need and if they can't help you they will find someone who can.  I am honored to know them and hope to be able to help them the only way I know how - GoFundMe.

If you are looking for a cause to donate to and want to know who the money will go to, then this is the way to do it.  Even if you don't pick this cause there are so many worthy campaigns who need help too.  If you can help them I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Six Word Memoir - Not Really Passive

Yes, I Judge a Book By Its Cover

I wish I could say that I was one of those people who do not judge a book by its cover but, I am. I am so one of those people who will read a book solely on the cover. That does not mean that I won’t read something that sounds good but if a cover does not capture my imagination it is very hard for me to pick up the book.

I think that is why it is so hard for me to read on my kindle. I love to look at the cover. I like using the flap for a book mark and I even like to see the author’s picture looking back at me.  Sue me, I am visual.

My first love is art and design. I respect that someone poured their heart and soul into the design. I even respect those who just do it and think nothing of it because they are so talented that they take it for granted.

I once thought I could make a living in the commercial arts but it was not for me. Cutting and pasting was tedious and I could not draw as well as those around me. Since Photoshop has replaced all that I learned to do by hand, I think if I were to take it up now it would be different.

My Top 5 Favorite Book Covers

by way of amazon.com affiliate links

Griffin & Sabine: An Extraordinary Correspondence

This is not just a book (or series of books) but art.  Each page is a piece of correspondence either by postcard or by letter that you remove from its envelope.  The story is beautiful and tragic but the pages are breathtaking.

Practical Magic

The whimsy that is captured in this design sums up the book as well as the myth that witches are evil looking woman with crooked noses and pointed boots that ride brooms.

The Witching Hour

The cover screamed at me to read and became the favorite book of my teenage years.  Lighting, spooky fog and an old house in New Orleans, sold!

A Discovery of Witches: A Novel (All Souls Trilogy)

I love the simplicity of the design and the mystery of what it could mean.

The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy

Silly and fun, like the book but overly simplified to hide the complexity of the themes.

What is your favorite book cover?

My Old School Happy Song

When I was young I worked at a nightclub.  I was a coat check girl, a door girl, occasional bartender, the office girl and a manager.  It was so cool.  I was so young.  The best part was being allowed in the DJ booth to play with the lights.  My favorite song at the time was Amber's Sexual and I only heard it at the club.

One of the DJs eventually put it on a mix tape of club songs so I would stop asking to hear it played.  I lost the tape but now I can hear it whenever I want.

This song still makes me so very happy.

Word(less) Wednesday - First Friends

My first best friend was Joanne and we met in kindergarten.  She told me that boys kiss girls and introduced me to Guns n' Roses.  She moved in the eight grade and I only saw her one more time.  I friend requested her on Facebook recently, still waiting on that one.  I guess she does not share the same nostalgia.

My first real friend as an adult I met when I was nineteen when I worked for a photo lab.  Strangely it is also where I met my husband.  We all worked together at one time or another.

He and I drove cross country, smoked cigarettes in coffee shops, drank underage in dive bars, ate cake while driving with no place to go, danced together, cried together and certainly laughed together.  He was even my witness at my wedding.

An Old Fashioned Surprise

I am not very good at executing surprises. I try; I fail and will try again. Sometimes it is the lack of interest. Occasionally I lose track of time and can’t commit to the surprise but more often it is because I don’t lie as well as I once did. I ruin it if asked a question head on or worse I forget that I was supposed to be keeping a secret. This is why surprising the kids and husband is on my list of 39 things to do before 40.

I had a rare opportunity to really surprise my son at school. My son loves when I go to school. He is still at an age that he loves me and wants me around. He has been begging me to volunteer at the school and I usually do but it is holiday parties. I can request those days. An odd day to volunteer falls under his dad’s responsibilities. He has a rotating shift and is able to do it.

I must admit that at the last after school event when the third person said to me, “Oh! YOU are Corey’s mom!” I knew it was time to show my face at a PTA meeting. As fate would have it, the school needed volunteers for Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics (STEM) day. Since I was not sure if I would be able to get the day off I did not tell my son. He gets emotional and does not handle disappointment well.

As it turned out I had a paid volunteer day left and got the day off. Of course, the third grade class was the very last to go which is probably for the best because he would have wanted to hang out with me the rest of the time.

I was responsible for communications and holograms. The two displays have absolutely nothing in common other then they needed adults to man them, I did both. I would explain how the first phone had to be connected by an operator and moved from that to how payphones worked. I would then herd them to the holograms and let them play with the lights that shinned on them.

 I repeated my speeches for kindergarten through fifth grade students all. day. long. I have no voice and I longed for the silence.  My favorite grade was the fifth graders who did not need much explanation and asked the best questions. The worse kids are hands down the first graders. Cute but oh boy are they energetic!

I was a little disappointed when I first got my assignment. I wanted something cool like 3D printing or gears. Boy, would my little man be surprised for that! But once I started telling the kids that there was a time before cell phones I knew this was the place for me.

I drank my Starbucks, checked in on FourSquare and instagramed a few photos while reminiscing about the rotary phone in parent’s room and how the family phone was bolted to the kitchen wall. They were amazed when I said that I could not leave the kitchen with the house phone. It was surreal to explain that I always had a quarter on me just in case I had to use a pay phone and they were just as astonished that if no one answered there was no other way to get a hold of my parents if they were not home.

Now it seems I am always available. The Husband would argue that I never answer my phone when he calls but I always call him back when I can. I don’t keep my phone attached to me. It is in my purse and more often than not I keep my purse in the trunk. I also hate to talk on the phone when driving. I know my limits and talking and driving are not one of my talents.

At work I help curate a twitter account and two pinterest accounts. Weirdly, they are on technology. I have a firm grasp on some things not so much on other areas but I work with two other guys who know what I don’t. And at home is where I write and blog and all of those tedious things that go along with blogging.

Unplug? I need to do it a lot more and surprises like today are one more reason to unplug, not completely but partially.

Guess what my third grader’s favorite exhibit was? If you guessed mine - you are right and boy was he surprised to see me.  Mission completed.

That Post I Never Published About Vaginas

Photo via Imugur.com

When baby girl was first starting to use the potty she was a year and a half. She wasn't actually using it but she would ask to go after the fact. That lasted a month.

At two, baby girl asked to use the potty and would sit there for a few minutes, asked to be wiped and went off to play. And, then she would dirty her diaper.  That lasted a month and then she asked to wear panties.  That lasted a day.

I had started writing a blog post about how easy it was for baby girl to be trained to use the potty. I never got to finish it. She was not easy, she did not want to use the potty when she should and it would take another year and a half for her to be diaper free.

I had suspected that when it was time she would just use the potty. I was right but wrong on the time frame.

On the day that baby girl consented to wearing panties I came across this post: Sex vs. Character: What Do We Teach Our Girls?  by Lisa Belkin.. It referenced the HuffPost Parents article that ran a letter from an 8-year-old titled "Why Being A Girl Is Wonderful."

Written on a legal pad in rounded kid penmanship, it radiated pride: "We have veginas. We get jobs. We are creative. We have stuff that makes us pregnet. We have milk in our bobes. We are smart. We have power."

The post I never published was going to honor her accomplishment and her womanhood in some way.  I wanted to express to her that she owned her vagina and I would refuse to call it by any other cutesy name that was designed to inspire embarrassment instead of pride.  I never published that post.

I did eventually go on to write two posts about potty training - one expressing my distress and the other celebrating that it finally happened. So I guess I did post it, eventually, but it was not the roar inspiring one I had intended.

Do you have a post you never published or one you would like to write?

I am Not a Morning Person.

I am not a morning person. I never was and it is even worse now that I am a mom of two kids. I have to wake up when the kids do and usually before they do. This was not the case when I was a mom of one.  I had no idea how unprepared I was for two.

I once cherished the morning hours, the raw sunlight, the beautiful silence and the slow easy way to wake up. And by wake up, I mean I was probably already awake from the night before and I was actually going to bed. Or, I was off to brunch with friends.

Working in bars and restaurants had led me to a nocturnal way of life. Sleep till ten, work at eleven and home by 3:00 AM. I worked two jobs and wanted a social life. Morning was for sleeping.

Even after having my oldest, I was still not a morning person. I had a proper day job which forced me to be up but my son was a pretty good sleeper so he was not getting me up much past his first his year. When I was laid off, I went back to work at a restaurant and got back in the lazy morning mode.

Of course working in a restaurant with a child is not ideal when denied for health care. According to the guidelines I qualified, but due to a crappy case worker who did not like me I got denied. That is not an exaggeration. WIC, yes, Healthy Child, hell no. I started applying for a good day job with benefits and was back in the nine to five grind six months later.

Don’t get me wrong. I l-o-v-e my job, love my boss and thankful for the employment but I miss mornings doing nothing. Now I struggle to get out of bed. I just want to stay in the warm comfort of my blanket.

It was when my baby girl was born when I truly learned what it was like to be a mom, a parent and without sleep, without mornings. I never cried about loss of sleep before but not only was I yearning for sleep, I was really crying due to the lack of sleep I was (or wasn't?) getting and it was the worse time for me.

Baby girl is now three and sleeping through the night is still hit or miss. When she sleeps, it is heaven, when she sleeps in her bed – nirvana.

I started waking in the middle of the night her second year. It was and is the only time I get to be alone. It is when I started taking blogging seriously and it is when I could catch up on TV show. I also spent an ungodly amount of time playing Angry Birds and Words with Friends. This was my time.

I did not feel like I was a mom until I had two kids. One kid is in no way a preparation for having two and I think I knew that way down deep and never truly felt like a parent but just a mom and a kid hanging out.

When moms of one complain I just look at them and wonder why. There are moments when I wish it was just the three of us again. I would not have it any other way, I adore my little girl, but there are moments when Baby Girl is at her worst that I imagine what life would have been like with just one child.

Of course I berate myself all night and into the wee hours of the morning but it is also mixed with the sounds of her night terrors slash temper tantrum, depending on the night.

Would I change it?  No, absolutely not.

Am I a morning person or night owl? Yes.

My Favorite Hour...

My favorite hour has always been late afternoon.

The light this time of day is stunning and it seems to want to hold on to this world just a little longer.

As beautiful as this time of day is, any hour is my favorite when I get to spend it with these lovely little faces.

 I just want to hold on to them just a little longer.

Rocky River Nature Center

5 Things in My Fridge and a Recipe for Pizza Bread

I am way more embarrassed by what is not in my Frigidaire then what is in my Frigidaire. I would like to show you a picture of a perfect fridge chock full of organic fruits and vegetables and some other high end health food we really can’t afford, but I would have to break into someone else’s house to get that picture.

What I will share of the five things in my fridge are: a stupidly big bag of baby carrots, a few bottles of Slimfast, a bottle of Natalie’s lime juice (to make limeade), leftover pesto with chorizo pasta and pizza bread.

Pizza bread (also called pepperoni bread) is not hard to make per say but it is tedious. You have to make the dough and roll in out, spread out the cheese and roll it up. Despite all of that hard work, it tastes so good and has only five ingredients (if you don’t make the dough from scratch) so it is well worth the effort.

Pizza Bread in 5 Ingredients

1. Packaged Dough Mix
2. Mozzarella
3. Pepperoni
4. Olive Oil
5. Pizza Sauce

• Make the dough as directed and roll it out so it as about ¼ inch thick.
• Cover the dough with mozzarella and top with pepperoni.
• Starting at the longest side, roll the dough until it is a loaf and pinch the ends.
• Drizzle olive oil on top and gently rub it over the loaf. (you can top the oil with basil if so desired or and Italian blend). Slice a few air vents on the top.
• Bake for 25 minutes at 350 degrees or until the top is brown.
• Serve with marinara or pizza sauce on the side for dipping.

And of course, while you are making your dinner the kids can make theirs... 

One Movie, Five Days, Repeat

Imagine if you could live a week in your favorite movie. 

Sometimes I feel like I do already. I get so easily immersed into things that I could trick my mind into thinking I live there already.

I use to do that with books when I was a kid. It was so easy to get lost in the pages. It is harder for me to do that as an adult but for an hour or two I certainly get lost in the images I see flashed on the screen before me.

I prefer TV shows to movies. If you follow me at all I am sure you can guess which TV show I would love to live in for more than a week but a movie is harder to pick. Sure there is a made for TV movie but that seems like cheating a bit since it is not really a movie.

I could pick a movie that would inspire me with my list like Rocky or Flashdance. I could train with them and check something off the list. Imagine me running with Rocky up the steps? It’s a movie, I could so do it. Or, maybe me as a dancer, auditioning for the chores line?

Then there are all the adventure movies I adore like Princess Bride or Serenity. I could be a salon girl and seduce Jayne or maybe a pirate for the Dread Pirate Roberts. Girl pirates are hot. So is Jayne.

I could go with what I know like Waiting or Magic Mike. I waited tables for many, many years and I managed an “all-male revue.” I could so do either of those with my eyes closed, not that I would want to.

But to spend five days in a movie I would like to make it meaningful. I would want to check more than one item off my list and I would like to learn something. If I were to spend five days in a movie I would pick Groundhog Day.

I thought really hard over this and am surprised by my choice as well but I came to it while thinking of Sliding Doors which is on my top five list of all time. But, would I want to spend five days in a world of what ifs when I could just repeat the same day over and get everything right that I needed to do?

I could relive my day and learn life lessons while hanging out with Bill Murphy and Andy McDowell. Sure it is winter and cold but who cares, I could eat till I puke and then get lipo surgery and no one would know because I would have recovered.

I think I could even cross all of the things off my list and then do it all again. It really would be ideal. Say everything I want to say and no one would remember! Brilliant. I wonder if my Foursquare check-ins still count?

Which movie would you like to spend five days in?

Six Word Memoir - Herstory

Another day in herstory. 40's next.

39 Things to do (in the year) Before I Turn 40

It is so hard to believe that I will be forty next year. I don't feel old. Well sometimes I feel old but certainly not thirty-nine much less forty.

I remember crying to a friend that I would be old before I would get married or have kids. I didn’t even want to get married or have kids but my seven year one night stand had gotten married.

That feeling of utter helplessness because life wasn’t stopping while I figured things out was so heavy. All of a sudden I was feeling stifled by some antiquated idea of happily ever after. There was so much I still had to do.

Then life caught up.

Now that I am a year from being forty I have made a list.

39 Things to do (in the year) Before I Turn 40

1. Do something spontaneous. - I agreed to do a campaign with the Cleveland Visitor's Bureau and it was fantastic! 

2. Get a payout from Google Ads. - so very close!

3. Take yoga again.

4. Get my passport.

5. Take a trip.

6. Keep a gratitude journal longer than four months.

7. Laugh more.

8. Toss out all the granny underwear I have acquired and buy pretty panties.

9. Visit all of the museums at least once in University Circle

10. Go to church more.

11. Send birthday cards.

12. Tailgate for a football game.

13. Go ice skating.

14. Get a tattoo.

15. Go to a concert.

16. Empty the boxes in my basement.

17. Organize the playroom and donate what the kids don’t use.

18. See a musical.

19. Go to the county or state fair.

20. Ride a rollercoaster.

21. Swim in the ocean.

22. Plant a garden.

23. Take a class.

24. Go rock wall climbing.

25. Do a pub crawl.

26. Bake a pie from scratch.

27. I won’t cover (or pull) my grey hairs.

28. Visit my dad’s grave.

29. Throw a party.

30. Surprise my husband.

31. Surprise my kids. - Surprise #1

32. Read forty books. - again, so close!

33. Have a family volunteer day.

34. Complete Candy Crush.

35. Be more creative.

36. Donate blood.

37. Send a message in a bottle.

38. Take a train.

39. Lose 49 pounds.

I've got this.

Mary's a Grand Old Name

When I was born my father named me for the woman he loved. He did it while my mom was recovering so she had no say. My father gave me my mother’s name. First and middle name but thankfully, he left off the junior part.

I have been known as Lil Mary for most of my life. I have not been called that since I was thirteen at least not by anyone who knows me by that and has common sense. There was this one time that a younger cousin called me that to get my attention while we were in line at the Justice Center, I was 36 years old. I was there for jury duty he was there as a defendant. I have not talked to him since.

source

I was also called Mary Doll. I was called it so often that I thought it was my given name. It has a nice ring, why not?

I have tried to change the spelling of my name to differentiate between me and my mom. I made my friends who wrote me letters from college spell it Marrie. I must admit, I never formally adopted this spelling.

Google

I once worked at an upscale Italian restaurant and the owner would refuse to call me anything but Maria. Maria was on the seating chart and on my pay checks. It was so irritating going to the bank to try and deposit those sad little checks especially when it was a new teller who had not heard the story and I had to convince her that I was telling the truth. Eventually I quit. I just stopped showing up. I was young and besides I would never do that, it was Maria.

I am probably one of the only people in my circle of friends to want to marry just to change my name. I wanted so desperately to have my own name that it was so easy for me to fill out all those forms and embrace my husband’s name. Funny thing is that I miss the uniqueness of my maiden name. You could tell I am part Slovak and there are only four people with my maiden name in the phone book, me, my mom, my brother and someone I’ve never met.

But, I have my husband’s name. I still don’t have a name of my own. I sign things now with my initials so often I get called MJ as if it was my name and I don’t mind that for the most part, still it is not my name.

source

If I could change my name I would go with something that is in the same family like Moira \mo(i)-ra\ or Magdalene. I like Magdalene. I could be called Maggie or Mags for short. I’d have a nickname that wasn’t a female horse.

Alas, my name suites me and not just as a name but its meaning as well. I am bitter but I am also all of those other wonderful descriptions in the Urban Dictionary. I think I will keep it.

If you could pick your first name, what would it be?